small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>joggers</strong>

Friday, January 23


Ok, lets sweat the small stuff.

First on my list are joggers. You all remember that as part of my (cough) health regime, I’m walkin almost a mile every morning before I catch the bus for work. Actually it’s the farthest bus stop from where I park my car, which happens to be stright down Broadway near the big horse fountain. About a half mile of the walk is on sidewalks whilst the remainder takes me thru this small park that has a jogging trail. Now with it being winter and all, it’s still all dark and shit when I start, but usually gets fairly light before I get to where I’m going. But while walkin I get to see a lot of joggers out and about takin advantage of the park and it’s jogging trail which circles the park and measures out to be about a mile. Anyway, I don’t know whither it’s me, or that they’re too busy breathing and shit, but joggers tend to be very unsociable. I mean goddamn, you muthafucker’s know me, and that I’m all down with the good manners and shit. So when I’m lumbering along hoping that I’m not choking out my last breath or that my heart won’t drop out’a my ass, I still take the time to wheeze out a spiffy good morning when a jogger passes. But what do I get in return? Not a fuckin thing. Cocksuckers might take the time to make eye contact, but usually they just act like the huge bald black man walking toward em sayin hello is just a fuckin figment of their fuckin imagination, and they just blow past me. And don’t even get me started on the gay shit they wear to jog in. There’s the bunch that sports what looks like ballerina tights, and on top of that they’re wearin a light jacket. So that when you see em coming toward you out’a the dark, the muthafucker’s look like they forget to put on pants and shit. And I don’t see why they need to be jogging anyway. Most of em are stick thin, so it’s not like their doing it to loose weight. The other day I saw this super fitness queen jogging down a hill fuckin backwards. And when he got to me he flipped his ass around and started hopping up and down like some sort of evil fey bunny rabbit. It was like he was sayin, “look at me fatboy, I’m all svelte like a good fairy and I do five hundred sit-ups daily and never eat fast food”, I can run forever, hahahahahahahahahahahahaha”. Pious jogging little bitch.


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