small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>TARZAN MONKEY LOVE (old shit)</strong>

Friday, February 13


As a TV diversion I found an old Tarzan movie on the other night, not just any Tarzan but one of the old school ones starring Johnny Weissmuller. That shit still kills me. You had Tarzan who was married OR shacking with Jane who was played by Maureen O’Sullivan. And we all knew that he had to be ram jamming that ass like a starving man to cheese. Hell, when I was a kid I wanted to tap that ass. Then you had Boy. I’m still vague on where this muthafucker came from. He just showed up one day and never left. Oh yeah, can’t be forgetting about Cheetah with his mad humping ass. And you knew the monkey was bumping uglies with Jane, and Boy and probably Tarzan too. He was waaay too friendly and always had his hairy ass up all over Jane. Tarzan was the self-professed king of the jungle and was always kickin somethins ass. Jane was quite the classy chick and always had the foresight to keep wet or sweaty or covered in mud or some such shit that kept her clothes ripped up. Yeah, I could see that meeting, “Johnny, here’s the deal, you run around in a tiny loin cloth a with a hot half nekked women beating the shit out of the colored’s. And here’s the sweet part, all ya got to do is learn to grunt and say Women, or Boy and sometimes let the monkey put it in your ass cause that’s his perk”. Shit, ole Johnny was all over that deal. Nowadays Tarzan’s all PC and crap. No beating up Blacks around here and no horny monkeys flipping up the loin cloth. But back then that’s what he was all about. That muthafucker would swing down from a tree screamin and shit and whip the ass off a hundreds of Black folk all by himself. Oh, he had the beasts of the jungle at his disposal but still; he did most of the asskickin himself. Hmmm, good times.


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