curing what ails ya

So a muthafucker sits down and asks themselves, “how do I get the fuck rid of these goddamned hiccups”? Well ponyboys and girls, yer old friend Death has a sure fire old school cure for them muthafuckers, and I guaranfuckintee that if you follow my instructions the shit’ll work. First off get yourselves a glass of water. Then get yourselves a friend. Doesn’t matter if male or female or what, just get em. Ok, you gots the glass of water and you gots the friend. Here you go. Have the friends tightly cover your ears, either with their fingertips or by holding their hands tight over em. Now whilst your ears are closed you pinch your nose shut with your free hand while drinking down the entire glass of water with your other hand. Done? It may look stupid as hell but you’ll note that your hiccups are gone. It’s a pressure thing. You can all thank me later.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"