I really need to wipe that welcome sign off my forehead

Per my usual habit I’m sitting at the bus stop this morning waiting on the bus and watching all the women go into the coffee shops across the street. It’s a bit on the humid side, but birds are chirping and a couple of squirrels are playing with my shoelaces. I light a smoke and sit there void of any important thoughts, just relaxing, waiting on my bus watching women walk whilst squirrels play around my feet. All of a sudden the birds stop singing and the squirrels run off as a shadow casts its self over the bus stop. It’s some cat taking a seat on the bench next to me. Now being the observant man that I am, there are two things about this cat that I notice right off the bat. On his arms and chest and back are what looks to be EKG probes. You know the shit that nurse’s slap on you in the ER to monitor your heart and vitals?  I also couldn’t help but notice that the cat’s cock was hanging out. And why do you ask was his cock hanging out? Well, I’ll be more then happy to try to answer that one. He had on a t-shirt but the only thing keeping it on him was the collar and one sleeve, the rest of looked like someone had ripped it away from him. His ripped shorts were hanging somewhere near the vicinity of his knees as was his underwear. Oh, I guess I should mention that besides looking like a pile of crapped monkey shit, he seemed just a tad on the zoned side. So he walks into the bus stop and sits this big grocery sack on the bench while at the same time asking me for a smoke. I of course tell the cat that I don’t smoke. He tells me that’s cool then asks me if I’d watch his sack for a couple of seconds. (his paper sack, not his sac) He goes to cross Broadway when he seems to realize that his cock is hanging out and he makes a halfhearted attempt to pull his pants and underwear up. So now with only part of his cock showing he walks across to where folks are sitting in front of Starbucks and the Broadway Coffee Shop to see about bumming a cigarette. All who I might add acted like it was an everyday thing to have some beat-up looking mostly nekked cat with his cock hanging out ask for smokes. But anyway, he comes back and thanks me for watching his sack and takes a seat next to me on the bench to enjoy his smoke.

Him: “you waiting on the bus”?
Me: “yes”.
Him: “hmmm, which one”?
Me: “51 going downtown”.
Him: “sure is gonna be hot in Westport today”.

Then he crosses his legs and adjusts his socks as I stand to get on my bus which has just pulled up.

Me: “you have a good day”.
Him: “all right, thank you”.

I actually kept expecting to see flashing red lights coming down Broadway to get this cat. But it just goes to show that only in Westport can you sit and have a casual conversation with a half-nekked cat who looks like he just ran out of the ER like some ass-raped monkey. But you wanna know the strangest thing about the whole deal? Not once did it cross my mind to me to ask him what the fuck happened.  

"and the monkey flipped the switch"