small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>stab a bum save a cute puppy</strong>

Monday, September 20

stab a bum save a cute puppy

So Friday morning after stepping out of my car and locking it I start walking to the bus stop. Off to my left I see drawing bum guy loading his bike up with all his shit. This is one of the local bums that instead of hanging out on Monkey Island with others of his ilk, he parks his ass on the sidewalk down from the Hurricane and pesters the fuck out of folks about drawing their picture for change. I don’t even know if the cat’s any good or not cause his rap’s so full of bullshit I’ve never stopped to check out his shit. As soon as you step into his field of play he starts with the fucking yammering and doesn’t stop until you step out which is twenty feet away give or take. As a matter of fact the bar manager’s find his spiel so annoying that the first task of the doormen coming on duty every night is to fill buckets full of water and wet the fuck out’a the grass near the sidewalk where he usually sits. I heard this and I suggested that if muthafucker’s are doing shit like that, at least throw out some grass seed and shit, to make it at least look kosher. I mean like damn, if you’re gonna perpetrate shit at least make it look good. Anyway, after I sat down at the bus stop I continued to watch the cat, cause after loading all his crap on his bike he kept trying to coax this little puppy into reach. He made a spot in this basket for the little puppy to sit but every time he reached for the puppy his bike would start falling over, due to the fact that his shit had no kick stand to hold it up. So there he is supporting the heavily laden bike with one hand whilst trying to stretch and grab the little puppy with the other. But the puppy just sat there in the grass looking at the cat and playfully hopping out of reach. After thirty minutes my bus came and drawing bum guy was still there, holding up his bike trying to reach the puppy who kept just out of reach. Later that night at the Hurricane we all heard this huge commotion outside and watched as cop after cop ran by the window and the EMT’s show up. It seemed that drawing bum guy, the same cat that spent all that time that morning patiently trying to wheedle the little puppy to come within reach so he could put em in the basket had just upped and stabbed another bum in the face. I couldn’t help but wonder what happened to the puppy.
"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now that's great spot reporting. Awesome story Greg, I'm linking later tonight/early morning!



9:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was just witness to four of our local Monkey Island residents singing the Barney "I love you, you love me..." song. It really brightened up my day!

- Corey

11:45 AM  
Blogger Sapphire Raven said...

Hey can we feed the monkey's daddy thier so funny and cute.....awwwww look at the monkey....awwww look Aaaahhhhh! run run. Zoo keeper quick get the traquilizers the monkeys are fighting again.....They are an entertaining bunch of poeple lol. It's amazing what life gives to entertain us.

11:20 PM  

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