small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>step away from the cereal and no one gets hurt</strong>

Thursday, November 18

step away from the cereal and no one gets hurt
Have I ever talked about how peaceful it is at the bus stop in the mornings? Like this morning the air had a slight chill in it and a light rain was falling and there were no stinkin assed bums hitting me up for change. I’m just sitting there feeling all content and shit drinking my hot coffee from Broadway Coffee and having a smoke, thinking how the cinnamon I added to the coffee goes so well with the coco in it. The light turns red and a turn my attention to all the cars stopped at the light and start checking out all the chicks inside their cars. All of a sudden the sight of this chick eating inside her car shatters my serene mood. Not a big deal in it’s self, but the little cumguzzler is sitting there at the red light shoving spoonful after spoonful of cereal down her throat. Watching her eat this cereal really bugged me for some reason. First off its fuckin morning rush hour traffic and here’s this chick in this car holding this huge bowl of what looks to be cornflakes and milk. I’m sitting there thinking that she has to put that muthafucker down before the light turns green. But no, light turns green and off she goes shoving cereal into her mouth whilst balancing the bowl against the steering wheel. And I can’t even begin to imagine how she was shifting the fucking car. What is the deal with some people? Damn, I’m just sayin is all.
"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Jessica said...

Well, for fuck's sake, I thought that only happened around here! Last week I had occasion to be driving on the Capitol Beltway during morning rush. I was bored, I was hungry, but I wasn't eating. While inching along at 1 mile per hour, then rushing up to 80 and back down to 1, along with the rest of the lemmings, I saw THREE people eating cereal from bowls in their cars--the drivers I mean. One guy was eating froot loops, there's no mistaking that rainbow colored death in a bowl. The other two appeared to have someone inocuous like grape-nuts (though doesn't grape-nuts sound like something you need an innoculation *agains*???) Anyway, it was the creepiest thing I'd ever seen--and they never stopped eating to drive from what I could tell, either.

Simply fucked up.

3:33 PM  
Blogger Death said...

jessicia!! what is the name of your site!!!

4:06 PM  
Blogger Jessica said...

Http:// (on your links, I'm, "The Woman with One Red Shoe")...though I warn you, lately I've been watonly domestic on the damned thing.

7:00 PM  
Blogger Death said...

dammit, how could I not remember that? And you're doing fine on your site by the way

8:12 PM  
Blogger Jessica said...


10:05 PM  
Blogger Pammy said...

First time I drove home from Florida, I hit Atlanta at about 6 p.m. Not a good thing to do, by the way. The traffic alternated between something akin to a snail crawl and all-out, balls to the wall, flat-assed flyin. I noticed at least 4 women reading as they drove past me. READING. Books. Holding them in their right hands, steering with their left, looking down to read and occasionally glancing up to do what they were supposed to be doing, which was DRIVING. the. fucking. car. Unbelievable.

12:32 AM  

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