small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>sweatin the small stuff</strong>

Friday, January 21

sweatin the small stuff

member of the infamous "Red Purse Society" perhaps?

I see where the ongoing battle involving Conservative Christians and cartoon characters has fuckin escalated. Some of you might remember Nile Rogers, the cat who fronts the band Chic, famous for the tune “Le Freak”? Well he also fronts a nonprofit group called the “We are Family Foundation”, which was formed in response to the events of 9/11 to, and I quote “continue the work of promoting our common humanity and the vision of a global family through the use of a simple song and message; We are Family”. Whatever, but it seems that the foundation put together a music video starring SpongeBob Squarepants, Barney, Winnie the Pooh, Bob the Builder, the Rugrats amongst others doing the Sister Sledge song “We are Family”, to promote tolerance and diversity.

The video and CD is going to thousands of schools in March, which has the uppity Christians all up in arms and shit. Especially since some of the ones that could read saw the tolerance pledge on the foundation's Web site, which asks people to respect the sexual identity of others along with their abilities, beliefs, culture and race. So of course after reading that, the good Christians are accusing the “We are Family” foundation of exploiting innocent cartoon characters to promote the acceptance of homosexuality and shit of that ilk amongst children.
Of course this isn’t the first time that Conservative Christians have made cartoon characters the target of their ire.

Remember back when SpongeBob Squarepants, who lives in a pineapple under the sea, was "outed" by the Christians after reports that the TV show and its merchandise are popular with gays. And of course we all remember when the Christians went after Bluto and Popeye for acting gay and holding hands. And let’s not forget the infamous incident where the fuckin Rev. Jerry Falwell described Tinky Winky, the purse-toting purple Teletubbie, as a gay role model. You know, with all the bad shit in the world going on, is this the best that muthafuckers can come up with, a fucking witch-hunt against cartoon Characters?

And in Arkansas, after getting reports for months about this mystery nekked jogger, the local cops finally got their man. The cat was out doing his buck nekked jogging when he ran his nekked ass by a police car. He was ordered to stop and when he failed to do so, he got his nekked ass tasered. Which also brings up the age-old question, what is it with nekked muthafucker’s wanting to run from or fight the cops. It’s bad enough running from the cops, but running nekked with your shit all flapping about and shit isn’t cool. The cops went on to say they can’t imagine why anyone would want to jog nekked at night.

I don’t see the big mystery here, the cat enjoyed running around nekked, simple as that. Hell, who hasn’t gone to the park or woods and felt the urge to strip off all their cloths and run around in the buff? Fuck, I used to do it all the time, go skinny-dipping and all that good shit. Though I never understood the term “skinny-dipping, how is jumping buck assed nekked into a pond or your local fountain skinny-dipping? Huh? Especially in my case, I really doubt if a muthafucker saw my ass nekked in a fountain they’d call it skinny-dipping. They might call it a travesty against nature, but not skinny-dipping. Word.

And the “you can’t make this kind’a shit up category”. In Tennessee whilst interviewing prospective jurors to work a trial involving this chick that smacked her brother’s girlfriend in the face with a brick in a severe case of trailer park violence, here’s what happened.

1.One man got up and left, announcing, "I'm on morphine and I'm higher than a muthafucker."

2.When the prosecutor asked if anyone had been convicted of a crime, a prospective juror said that he had been arrested and taken to a mental hospital after he shot his nephew. He said he got pissed because his nephew just would not come out from under the bed.

3.Another would-be juror said he had had alcohol problems and was arrested for soliciting sex from an undercover officer. "I should have known something was up," he said. "She had all her teeth."

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Belle said...

LOL @ the jurors in TN. I thought parts of KY were I'm from where ass backwards but damn. Great blog!

6:30 PM  
Blogger satyavati said...

Uh huh. I'm learnin the way of the world out here in my lil trailer. And I got my brick ready. Anybody comes messin with me, they gonna eat the brick. Then you'll be writin in your blog about me...

Good Lord.. have I become trailer trash?

6:49 PM  
Blogger Sapphire Raven said...

That does it! Rangers it's morphing time.....Purple ranger power up....Ohhhhhh! God forbid thier ever be a purple power ranger......Morons I'll show them. Mega Zord Unicorn Go!.....LoL..Ironic isn't it.....Evermore

5:50 PM  

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