drinking & talking don't always mix

Even though it was a three day weekend I didn’t get much done, except for one night where I went out I spent the weekend here at home catching up on sleep and all that. Sunday night I went to the Hurricane to hear some live music. My boys in drag “Vibralux” were headlining the show that night and since I hadn’t heard em in a long while I figured going out on a Sunday would be worth the effort. And of course the one time in ages when I decided to go out on a Sunday night it had to be less then expected.

See, that’s how shit rolls in my world. All during the week all I hear is all the fun muthafuckers had this Sunday or that Sunday or last Sunday, the Sunday I go out its just odd. First off I get there and run into all the cats from Vibralux who share a chat with me which was cool. Need I mention that the whole band dresses in drag, on and off the stage? They split for a while and as I’m sitting there I can’t help but notice the sketchy chick sitting near me at the bar.

You know the kind of chick I’m talking about right? The kind that back when I was younger I would’a talked too, but now that I’m older I know better ways to waste minutes in my life I’ll never get back. She was talking to the bartender about a job and then she went all Sybil and shit, asking one of the doormen how bad was it when she got tossed out’a some rock show down the street. Seems that Sybil got so fucked up that that not only did she get her crazy ass thrown out of a concert, but started fighting the doormen, losing her clothes in the process, and she didn’t remember a fuckin thing.

I told the bartender later that oh yeah, you want her working behind a bar full of booze don’t you? Then I hear a loud commotion and thru the back door come a bunch of cats I can only describe as NASCAR fans. These cats were loud, coarse and of course weren’t from around here. So as I’m sitting there nursing my drink I’m thinking, this is turning into one big ole clusterfuck, crazy chick, NASCAR cowboys, alturnitive rockers, and any minute the cats from Vibralux would be wondering back in wearing dresses and makeup. I looked up at the bartender saying, “why shit gotta get all odd on the nights I show up”?

"and the monkey flipped the switch"