oh no he didn't

Rusty from Planet Rusty keeping me off the
last muthafucker I caught
wearing my favorite shirt


So you know how you always hear that line that you never stop learning some shit? Well it’s true. I used to laugh at chicks when I’d see em get upset because some other chick walked into the club or party wearing the same outfit. Silly chicks, I’d think, making such a fuss simply because some other chick’s wearing the same dress or blouse.

But the other night I’m in the Hurricane and this cat walks in wearing my favorite tattoo shirt. I grabbed this guy sitting next to me and said do you see that muthafucker; he’s wearing the same shirt I got. Then the cat said, yeah, and he’s also big and bald just like you but white. I found myself sitting at the bar thinking how lucky that muthafucker was that I decided not to wear my shirt that day.

And I know I didn’t have it on, but the gall of some muthafucker to dare not only buy but wear my favorite shirt. And it looked like shit on em. I actually found myself sitting there getting angry that my shirt was on somebody else, and he had the nerve to be bald too? I couldn’t help but think that if I had worn the same shirt one of us would’a had to come out of it or leave, and bet your bottom dollar it wouldn’t be me.

Then it struck me, wow, how fuckin unreasonable was I being. I had to look down to check wither my mangina was pooking out or not. Look at me sound all bitchy and shit. But then it was my favorite shirt and nobody wears my favorite shit but me. By that time the bartender was looking at me going; “what the fucks your deal, you’re all hyperventilating and shit and haven’t blinked in the past half hour”. “Get over it”.
"and the monkey flipped the switch"