so sad

You guy’s have seen the commercial for salad dressing where the cat is sitting at a table eating salad and the dressing makes him think of home and family, right? The person’s sitting all alone in this room which but for a table is empty and it’s dark and outside you can see that it’s cold and raining.

As he’s eating his salad he envisions being at home with all his family members who join him at the table for dinner. But who then disappear just as quickly as they popped up. You’ve all seen the commercial haven’t you? So, riddle me this, isn’t that some of the saddest shit you’ve ever fuckin seen outside of a goddamned soap opera?

What the fuck do these muthafucker’s think they’re selling here? Cocksucking salad dressing or my fuckin life is so fucked up that when I’m eating salad which is all my broke ass can afford, and that money comes from selling blowjobs in the ally. And I’m sitting all alone in the dark in my empty cold hovel shoveling greens down my throat which is still raw from sucking all that cock, I miss my family back home so much my starving burnt throat from sucking cock ass, starts to hallucinate so bad from hunger that I begin so see my family in the room having dinner with me.

It’s cold and dark and raining outside and how sad is this shit. Somewhere someone’s coughing down a fuckin bullet cause watching the same commercial just sent their ass over the edge and they just killed themselves. All because some stinking hipster in an ad agency thought this would be a clever way to sell salad dressing.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"