small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: luck of the stupid

Tuesday, January 3

luck of the stupid

I’ve been reading about that stupid Florida teenager who decided he wanted to see for himself what things were like over in Iraq. So the muthafucker snuck off to Baghdad for an unauthorized three-week trip without a by your leave from his parents or a fuckin clue in his goddamned head what he might be getting himself into. The only people that know what he was up too were a couple of his high school stoner buddies. After a few misadventures and almost getting himself killed, he actually made it back home in one peace, with the help of the U.S. Embassy I might add.

I don’t know if this kid is brave or just really stupid with the luck of the oblivious from having seen too many movies. I just know his whole story irritates me to no end. I guess I could say that I admire his intestinal fortitude but wouldn’t mind introducing him to the business end of a baseball bat for being a young pissant.

Besides being an idiot muthafucker and traveling to a war zone just because he wanted to talk to the Iraq people and see how things are for himself. He so much reminds me of the gay little bastard that played Tom Cruise’s son in the “War of the Worlds”. You remember that kid right? “Dad, why are we running away, why aren’t we fighting back? Dad I want to go see this, Dad I have to go see this, why won’t you let me go fight the machines??” That kid was almost as irritating as Dakota Fanning’s screaming pissy pantied character. And who wasn’t happier then a muthafucker when Tom told the kid to step off and go? Jesus, let the little gay bastard go get himself killed.

Ok, ok, ok, anyway the reason the two remind me of each other is that they both were so intent on seeing what’s going on for themselves that they just blow off anyone telling em different. Only armed with the “quotation fingers” “knowledge and bravado” “quotation fingers” that comes with being so fuckin young and ig-nor-ent, off they both go in search of knowledge and shit. But wait, it’s not safe? Fuck that, we’re young and seen all the movies, so we know how it’s done. But wait, I’m not only your parent, but older and wiser and know the dangers you’ll get into. Fuck that, I know what’s best for me.

It’s like telling a little kid over and over that the fuckin dog might bite so don’t be petting the stinkin dog or playing in it’s yard. But do they listen, fuck no, they go pet the fuckin dog and end up getting half their fuckin face bit the fuck off. And now everybody’s all upset and wanting to sue and kill the dog even though the fuckin kid was told it’ll be a bad thing. Fuck these Ferris Bueller muthafuckers. Life is an adventure but only when you listen to those whose gone down that road.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Ole Blue The Heretic said...

I watched War of the Worlds this weekend and was pissed off, irritated, and generaly anoyed by just about every character in that movie.

The piss ant in the movie did remind me of the kid that you were talking about at first, and thought it funny when you started talking about that stupid bastard in the movie.

Fuck that was an irritating movie!

10:56 AM  
Blogger Bella said...

Heard about that one too. What an idiot. It just goes to show you that kids are just getting dumber these days. Nice "No Child Left Behind" law our government passed. More like "No Child Left Educated".

Word Verification: fjnfkd

1:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry, I lost my concentration on the part that said “quotation fingers” “knowledge and bravado” “quotation fingers”.

You shouldn't be “quotation fingers” "a quotation fingers abuser" "quotation fingers" when you use terms like “quotation fingers” “knowledge and bravado” “quotation fingers”.

I don't mean to imply any disagreement with your comments. I enjoyed reading about Farris Hassan's day off. I'm just trying to “quotation fingers” “help” “quotation fingers”. K Sose

1:17 PM  
Blogger satyavati said...

I'm gonna make a conditional exception here, because I'm the pissant who just has to go see for herself.

Nothing ever gets done, no real progress made in a life until you're willing to take a risk. The difference is that if you're the pissant going out on a limb, you have to take responsibility when it falls under you and you break both your legs. These days, everybody wants to sue or blame someone else. That's the bullshit part. I admire that kid for going to Iraq; it's the kind of idiot thing I would have done twenty years ago. As long as his family says, "OK, our kid's an idiot, excuse us while we take him out back and whup his ass thoroughly before we ground him until he's old enough to qualify for Medicare" then I think things are all right. If the family had gone on a rampage blaming the military and whatnot, then it completely loses its value.

Like when I just HAD to drink an entire pitcher of Long Island Iced Tea despite the warnings of every breathing person within two miles, and I ended up with alcohol poisoning and no one to blame but myself. Some things you just have to learn, and do for your own self, even though they're risky. Sometimes they pan out and sometimes they blow up in your face. As long as you remember that it's your own stupid fault for not listening to everyone, I think it's a good thing to do now and then.

2:52 PM  
Blogger Death said...

I fully understand about taking risks and all that. I done many of em in the past myself if for nothing else to see what’s on the other side of the fence. But this kid’s still a dumbass pissant and the only thing I find to admire about him is the fact that he made it that far. The only reason as far as I see it that the stupid kid didn’t die is that his looks enabled him to blend in a bit that is until he opened his mouth. I still like my comparison with the stupid kid in “war of the worlds” cause that’s the same mentality I see in this kid.

4:08 PM  
Blogger TBOB said...

I just had to drink that entire pitcher of Long Islands and get alcohol poisoning for myself."

Sheeyaah. Okay.

Have to agree with ya, D. War of the worlds, while sort of cool imagery wise, kinda sucked in most ways, not the least of which being the brainless doof who has to run unarmed towards the big firefight where all our heavy duty military stuff it getting blown all to hell.

That and the willie wonka look after the baddies finish with their red spray.

8:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stupid is as stupid does sir. Look at it this way. If it's that easy for someone to get over thier and see what's going on. Then they are going to get all big balled and do the same thing to us. They already started with plowing planes into buildings. What's next sir.

Forest Gump

6:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm with satyavati on this one. If you're curious, ain't nothing going to satisfy that itch like seeing for yourself. Yeah it was dangerous and yeah he could have been killed or kidnaped.

Wasn't it general knowledge that if you sailed far enough to the west, you'd sail off the edge of the world?

Fulling realizing the inherent dangers, I myself am going to visit Kurdistan this summer. I want to see it for myself and it's supposed to be relatively secure. Some day, I'd love to see southern Iraq for myself too.

3:33 PM  

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