small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: back by old sweatin the small stuff

Thursday, April 20

back by old sweatin the small stuff

I sat down the other night to watch the DVD that my friends picked up for me whilst they were over in Amsterdam a few weeks ago. Yeah, I’ve been into this thing for years that whenever someone I know goes overseas, I always tell em to bring me back some of that good (insert name of country here) porn. And would you believe someone actually did?

The DVD goes by the title "my dog is my cure" and it's a bestiality movie. You know, girl meets dog, dog falls in love with girl, and dog does girl. Not big on plot or character development but it's a dog. His main lines are wag the tail, drool a lot, lick…lick…lick, and hump the girl. Not a whole lot going on here if you know what I'm saying.

So I put the DVD into my computer to check it out, and on my TV I had the local news on. I actually found myself watching more of the news then the movie. It was that fucking boring. I mean like goddamn, it's not like I'm gonna walk by some chick humping her dog and not watch, but on film it was just blah. All it consisted of was some fat chick blowing her fuckin Dingo and trying to sit on it. Poor fuckin pooch.

It ain't bad enough that you're taken from your native wilds and stripped of your dignity, but then your furry ass is thrown into a room full of hot lights and forced to do some chick I wouldn't fuck for a chew toy. All I could think of whilst watching the movie was what was the dog thinking? Is it going
“what the fuck, damn that's one butt ugly dog they stuck me with? My big chance to fuck a human and this is the best I got to work with? Somebody get my agent on the fuckin phone"
But actually since it's a dog it's most likely thinking,
"food……….food…….food….must lick balls….must lick balls….must lick balls”
Michelle told me that because the movie bored me, it was a sign of how jaded and indifferent the Internet has made me. I told her she was full of crap, it was an ugly fat chick blowing a small dog. That in it's self is boring.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds like you have some great friends there Mr. Beck.


2:22 PM  
Blogger Sapphire said...

I will never eat again. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww gross. Ack! Ack! "hit's his head hard to get the image out" OOOOoooowwweeeeiiiii....Ok it's gone. Now where was I. You seriously need to get some pussy! I mean real pussy! Human pussy! With long legs and what ever hair color you choose, With breast's the size of godzilla's fist and a sex drive the size of king kong's dick and just to make it a dream come true. Think of everything you ever wanted in a woman and go out and get her!.......Evermore

9:11 PM  
Blogger LL said...

Dude, your friends couldn't get you somethin' else?!? It had to be bestiality? Sheesh.

10:25 PM  

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