sweatin the small stuff

From the “how much is that doggy in the window?” department......

comes a story, though sad it may be kind’a appeals to my base nature and brings a giggle to my lips.

It seems that up in rural Alaska this family’s dog had been let out into the yard on his leash to take a pee. According to my many inside sources the dog was a nine-month-old miniature Chihuahua, who went by the name of Casper.

Now the family has a couple of little kids who were hanging out on the couch watching ole Casper kill grass when one of the little spankers started screaming something about a black bear in the yard. Now with this being of course rural Alaska seeing the bears running thru muthafuckers yards might not be that much of an uncommon thing.

That is until ole Blackie spotted little Casper tied to the stake then it was on. To make a long story short the bear ambled up to Casper who was yapping his little ass off, took one sniff, and proceeded to eat that muthafuckin Chihuahua from asshole to eyeballs.

Kind’s makes you think of how many licks does it take to reach the gooey center huh?

Now thru the big living room picture window the kids are seeing all this go down and are understandably freaking the fuck out ten ways to Sunday.

According to my many inside sources kids were screaming so loud and shit that cars driving by on the road above the house were stopping and muthafuckers who lived clear across the way were grabbing guns and breaking into full on runs without even knowing the reason why.

And during all this the mother was trying to grab the kids and pull em away from the bovine feeding frenzy being enacted thru the window. That’s the kind of shit that’ll scar a muthafucker for life isn’t it?


"and the monkey flipped the switch"