small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: From the archives……… special e-mail!

Thursday, October 12

From the archives……… special e-mail!

This is sort'a long but the ending I think is worth it.

Dear Confidant,

Suddenly you got this mail and may be wondering who must have mailed. I am Rev. Pastor Samuel Francis, the Principal Pastor In charge of Redemption Camp and Grace Mission Abidjan Cote D'Ivoire.

We have in our camp two war displaced children of the Late William Keita a famous cocoa merchant who was killed at Bouaké along with the wife by the rebelling factions that are still at the moment in Control of the northern zone of the Country. The two Children were lucky to have escaped the war torn zone and are today in our Mission's house in Abidjan the economic capital of the country were they are seeking refuge.

We have in our possession two documents presented by them attesting that their late father deposited a metallic box containingUS$10,000,000:00(Ten Million United State Dollars) with a Security Company here in Abidjan which he declared to the Security Company to be photographic Materials meant for his un-named Foreign Partner for the purchase of Agro-Industrial Equipments. We have in our capacity verified this claim and the Security Company attested to its authenticity.

These children are now seeking for a foreigner who can be their “Guardian” and also represent them as their Father's Foreign Partner by assisting in the withdrawal of the box and also providing a Foreign Account where this fund could be lodged for onward investment as would be advised by you.

Your assistance to these hapless children would be in no small measure a blessing to you which you will never regret at the end of this transaction, as you must have succeeded in saving their future that is being threatened by the mal-adventures in the political environment of the country.

You can reply to this call for assistance if God touches you through the Mission's email box.
Remain Blessed.

Rev. Pastor Samuel Francis

MY Answer.......

Dear Pastor Samuel Francis

Being a student of Satan
"hail Satan" I don't usually commune with your ilk, but being the lover of small children that I am, "hail Satan" I feel the urge to help. And since my unholy lord "hail Satan" loves the little wee bitches also, "hail Satan" my brood and I will do what we can. But in return for his help "hail Satan" my dark master "hail Satan" will require both the children's souls. My master "hail Satan" eagerly awaits your reply.

Much love and all that good shit.
Hail Satan

The Rev. Pastor Samuel Francies repies to my reply!!

Dear Greg Beck,

Am sorry, you are not the best for this transaction, I as A Man of God cannot handle the soul of this children to you and your master satan okay, we are sorry to have came to you. I will let these day to bear me withness that you heard about the One and only God who can save. Do not think that He(God) can not forgive you, He will if you come back to him God LOVES you okay. May the Good Lord have marcy on your soul today and bring you back to His Kingdom Life.

Bye Bye, while we wait for your trip back to the God that made you.

From today I will always pray for your change.

Yours Brother in the LORD GOD.

Pastor Samuel Francis

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Ole Blue The Heretic said...

You stopped that phising scheme cold!

9:52 AM  
Blogger satyavati said...

You kill me.

11:04 AM  
Blogger curmudgeon said...

Praise Allah they left you alone.
At least for now...

2:21 PM  
Blogger Sapphire said...

Ok the only god I know is the one who gave us three things and left us alone to decide on our own. One A spirit, Second a body and third freedom of choice and from what I know and have learned that no matter what you do in life god will always love you. So as I said to one who was going to throw gods wrath on me for who and what I am. Who are you to take gods wrath and throw it on me, do you have permission from god himself to use his own powers up on me. Don't people like that just piss you off.

Hey I pray every night and thank god for what I have and what I have been given and I am always thankful for everything I have and I have love in my heart, that's all that I know that god ever wanted is to see us happy and loveing each other at the same time loveing him or her.

Thier is one thing after all the stuff I learned truthfully if you really look at it I think god is a woman...No offecne but the word creation brings the word woman in to place they gave birth to all of us. I say no more on this subject..........Evermore

2:21 PM  

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