small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: all the way to the bank

Wednesday, January 24

all the way to the bank


I’m digging the fact that little Dakota Fanning, child actress extraordinaire, ain’t above telling muthafuckers when to go fuck off. I guess at the Sundance Film Festival her new movie Hounddog is raising some sort of bigass fuss due to the fact that she plays a girl from the south that gets raped in the movie.

Not withstanding her screaming in the film “War of the worlds” which made me want to put a gun in her mouth, I’ve always dug Dakota since I first saw her on the Sci FI channel. She strikes me as a bright girl who gets it. And by getting it, I mean that she understands that she’s an actress being paid to act and that what she does is not real.

So when people from a Roman Catholic activist to the chairman of the Christian Film and Television Commission bitch about laws being broken and wanting the federal government to investigate the film, she knew what to tell them.

“First off, back the fuck off of my mother and agent plus my goddamned teacher because they were all on the set for the filming of the rape scene, so stop with the calling em bad people and shit.. The fuckin rape scene all these worthless uppity cocksockets are bitching about only lasts a few minutes but isn’t all fucked up and shit”. According to Dakota' there’s no nudity, the scene is very darkly lit and only her face and hands are shown.

"It's not really happening," Dakota said of a rape. "It's called a fuckin movie, and it's called muthafuckin acting, which means that I’m fuckin pretending so actually I'm not going through anything”. "And for me, when it's done it's done, so give me a fuckin coke and a smile plus one of those corndogs would be nice."

She went on to say, "Once the stupid scene's done I don't even think about it anymore so all you muthafuckers can kiss my ass and get the fuck out of my way as I go to the bank to deposit this big fuckin wad of movie money I’m making for pretending. Bitches!"

(Dakota’s of course too cute and young to curse like a middle aged black man so I took the liberty of cursing for her)

Anywho, didn’t people bitch back in the day about Brook Shields in “Blue Lagoon” and that one chick that played a twelve-year old hooker in “Taxi Driver”, and now arn't those considered classics and shit?


"and the monkey flipped the switch"

6 Comments:

Blogger Well Hell Michelle said...

I like how Dakota Fanning said something like, "Lots of children get raped every year in this country. Maybe people should be focusing on that issue instead of me acting in a movie." Smart kid for a 12-year old.

3:47 PM  
Anonymous Joshua Xalpharis said...

Yet they'll let Jesus Camp hit theaters.

They raped how many children? If no physically, they have still ruined their lives and stolen their innocence.

3:53 PM  
Blogger Rusty said...

FYI that was Jodie Foster in "Taxi Driver"

5:58 PM  
Blogger PGP said...

Two young actresses who did controversial roles ,Jodi Foster and Linda Blair....both grew up to be great people....both also had to deal with emotional scars from these roles.

In spite of what you may think about a 12 year old having her shit together the fact is that a 12 year old is a CHILD and does not have the tools to deal with this crap.

7:43 PM  
Blogger Xavier Onassis said...

Personally, I think she should hire you into her entourage to be her "Bitch Slapper".

When the media and special interest groups ask questions like that, she could just step back and say "I'm going to let Greg address that issue".

8:10 PM  
Blogger Ole Blue The Heretic said...

I bet all of those fuckers that are bitching have never even seen the movie.

I have heard from people who have actually scene the show that she could have been screaming about a fucking spider on her that is how unrealistic the scene was.

3:26 PM  

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