small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: sweatin the small stuff.....part one

Friday, January 19

sweatin the small stuff.....part one

From the “beat you like you owe me money” department…………….

Comes a story straight out of what has to be the oddest state in the fuckin union, California. The state Legislature wants to install a bill that makes it a crime to spank your child. We’re not talking about muthafuckers beating a kid down or abusing em and shit, but the simple act of smacking a kid if one feels the need to make em act right.

Since lawmakers can’t think of any reason to spank a kid that young the proposed law is mainly aimed at kids three years-old and younger. And before I throw in my two-cents, according to my many inside sources, in the global community this isn’t as odd as it sounds, because more than ten European countries already have this type of law in effect with Sweden having enacted this type of law as early as 1979. But then again it’s also legal to have sex with animals in Sweden.

The bill, which is still being drafted, will prohibit ``any striking of a child, any corporal punishment, smacking, hitting, punching, any of that.'' Muthafuckers in the legislature want to make spanking a kid a misdemeanor, punishable by up to a year in jail or a fine up to $1,000, although a legal expert advising them on the proposal said first-time offenders would probably only have to attend parenting classes.

Now with all that being said here’s my personal take on all this shit keeping in mind that I can only relate to my personal experiences. I don’t think there’s a goddamned thing wrong with disciplining a child by spanking their asses if need be.

By my age I’m clearly defined as what a muthafucker would call the “baby-boomer” generation. Both my parents worked and provided a great home for me and my siblings. I was raised in a neighborhood where all the parents worked and where the kids ran from house to house.
.....since I seemed to be getting all long winded and shit, I broke this post up into two part. Please page down for the second part.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger satyavati said...

Well apart from the warm fuzzies that the picture gave me...(and that's another post and another story..)

My mom had two specialties when I was growing up: a pink Avon hairbrush and the wooden spoon. Which side of the brush you got depended on how bad you'd been, but the spoon was the all-purpose implement of choice. She could handle that thing like it was a Louisville slugger and probably with the same amount of strength. As a joke (I wasn't laughing) this past Christmas I got her a wooden spoon 36" long.

Point being you're right: discipline (not abuse) doesn't hurt kids. Growing up with a lack of respect for authority does. I'll be the first to admit that I did a lot of bad shit comin up and I'm sure my sister did too (we keep our immoralities and illegalities to ourselves), but at least the beatings taught us that if you're gonna do really bad shit, you do it it quietly so you don't get caught/arrested/expelled/tossed in rehab.

I'm as liberal as it gets, but I believe that kids need structure and discipline and a sturdy refocusing of the power hierarchy in the world around them as needed. All of us didn't turn out so bad..did we?

11:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

didnt have ass whippin flash backs scheduled in for the day. the use of daddys uniform utility belt from way back is still fresh in my mind, along w/ the comments from teachers when i went to school the next day and the welp marks from the belt were fresh. teachers would knod and just say 'hhhmmm, got an ass whippin didnt ya?' those were the days when parents gave written permission to whip ass when a kid got out of line and no ramifications for the teachers.
aaaahhhh, to bring back corporal punishment to schools. make me get all giddy like.
--so reminisces the sister

12:06 PM  
Blogger Well Hell Michelle said...

I wouldn't beat my kids if I had any because I was never hit as a kid and I came out okay. A little mouthy, but okay. But just because I wouldn't do it doesn't mean I believe there should be a law against it.

12:51 PM  
Blogger Ole Blue The Heretic said...

I let those non spanking mother fuckers have my two nephews for one hour and you know damn good and well they will be beatin both of them.

12:59 PM  
Blogger Miss Ann Thrope said...

I just lost a long winded comment because blogger sucks ass.

I agreed with you and then some.

1:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't have kids and I'm I would feel differently if I did. But I WAS a kid and got "spanked" on a very regular basis and it still pisses me off. Why is it a crime to slap or punch an 18-year-old but not a 5-year-old. And yeah, I understand that not all spanking = abuse, but there's no way to regulate it. If you go to the Hurricane and someone is acting like a jackass and you haul off and slap him/her, you're going to jail. And you deserve to. Same thing happens with a kid and it's called "discipline." Uh, I don't think so. If anything the kid deserves more protection (and that's coming from someone who basically can't stand the little brats!). I can't believe it's taken this long to offer physical protection to our most vulnerable (physically) citizens. Kids ARE people, too, just like the old TV show. Why is it okay to "discipline" kids physically when it's a crime to do it to anyone else? Just sayin'

1:34 PM  
Blogger PGP said...

The point I take away is that many adults are desperately in need of a good spankin!!!


1:40 PM  
Blogger satyavati said...

*waving hand* I'm in need...

3:42 PM  
Blogger PGP said... are naughty! ;)

6:50 PM  
Blogger satyavati said...

see...?!! I SAID I needed a spankin!

8:00 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Brain Bomb said...

I'm with you Greg. My parents should've spanked my ass more. I was a total pain in the ass growing up. These politicians have nothing better to do. Don't get me wrong there are horrible cases of abuse but there is a line that every adult should be able to discern between a smack on the butt and full-blown judo chop to the chest. These politicians are ones to talk, aren't they. they're the first ones with their kids doing lines of coke in the club bathrooms and going to rehab at 13. They need to go home and learn how to put foot to ass.

8:00 PM  
Blogger Xavier Onassis said...

We were spanked by parents and paddled by teachers when we were young.

Guess what? We learned to not fuck up and do stupid shit or give sass back to an adult. We learned respect.

It wasn't abuse. It was corrective instruction designed to drive the point home to the lowest common denominator of behavior modification.

You don't understand anything else? Maybe you'll understand THIS!

"If I exibit behavior 'A', I will experience disproportionate pain. Therefore I will no longer exibit behavior'A'."

That being said, I would agree with legislation prohibiting the spanking of children 3 and under. I would probably even move that up to at least 5.

Does no good to spank children if they are unable to comprehend why they are being spanked. That truly is abuse.

9:11 PM  
Anonymous LL said...

So, I got a 10 year old and a 4 year old. The 10 year old...she's Ms. Saintly but when she ran towards a store in a busy parking lot at the mall, yes, I whooped her ass. My son, he gets 'em a little more regularly but it KILLS me to do it. Mainly, for me, a spanking gets hauled out for "Safety Issues." When my son has turned on the gas to the stove after I told him to never, EVER touch the stove...guess what...I spanked his little itty-bitty 3 year old hand and turned it pink. And you know what? He ain't NEVER touched the stove again.

Fuck those do-gooders. You can't make parents be GOOD parents and so those of us who try to be good and sometimes have to hand out a little corporal punishment to make the lesson stick, well they can just kiss my ass. I don't see them getting all boo-hoo over the shitbirds out there. I saw some crazyass "parenting advocacy" woman bailed out some lady accused of killing her baby.

Fuckin' do-gooders.

6:32 PM  

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