sweatin the small stuff

So do you think that when or if I ever buy a house that if I put a giant boulder in the front yard with the words “basium meus magnus pinguis ass” engraved on the front, that anyone will notice?

Think of it as my personal political statement, except that it’s in Latin.
(kiss my large fat ass)

Michelle went to see a local production of the Vagina Monologues last week. She said she really enjoyed it and I asked her was it mostly women that went to see it?

Her answer was yeah but there were some guy’s scattered through out. But they all had that look men have when either they’re doing something solely for the sake of getting laid or that look men get when shopping with a women and the main reason they’re there is to hold the purse.

But she did say that after watching it she thought it was something I would have enjoyed. On the same vein some of my many inside sources told me about what went down at the Atlantic Theater over in Jacksonville, Florida.

The Atlantic was featuring the Vagina Monologues and of course had it advertised on the marquee. And according to my many inside sources, some chick got all freaked out and shit cause her little niece saw the word vagina on the fuckin marquee.

The soccer mom pitched a fit to the theater and they pussied up and changed the shit to the Hoo-ha Monologues. What are these muthafuckers, thirteen? And it’s not like this is some cheap production put on by Willie the wino and his whores from down the way. This is some legit, award winning, known around the world shit.

But after a day or so the theater owners realized that they were actually barred by contract from changing the stupid name and were forced to change it back. Now this baffles me to no fuckin end.

I can understand if the muthafucker was called the “Pussy Farts Monologues”, or “the Ole slappy cunt monologues” or even “women who joke and talk about issues relating to their pussies monologues”.

Cause shit like that might offend or perk the little snapper heads interest and may even cause em to ask their punk ass parents an actual hard question or two which might cause the parents to think on their own.

But to get upset over the proper medical term vagina is just fucked up. It’s like come the fuck on, what’s gonna happen when the little girl starts her period or wants to know why there’s a hole down there.

What’s the parent gonna do, lie to her and tell her it’s her fuckin monkey or magic box or that’s where the dollar bills come from? I’m just saying and shit.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"