small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: sweatin the small stuff

Friday, March 2

sweatin the small stuff

So do you think that when or if I ever buy a house that if I put a giant boulder in the front yard with the words “basium meus magnus pinguis ass” engraved on the front, that anyone will notice?

Think of it as my personal political statement, except that it’s in Latin.
(kiss my large fat ass)

Michelle went to see a local production of the Vagina Monologues last week. She said she really enjoyed it and I asked her was it mostly women that went to see it?

Her answer was yeah but there were some guy’s scattered through out. But they all had that look men have when either they’re doing something solely for the sake of getting laid or that look men get when shopping with a women and the main reason they’re there is to hold the purse.

But she did say that after watching it she thought it was something I would have enjoyed. On the same vein some of my many inside sources told me about what went down at the Atlantic Theater over in Jacksonville, Florida.

The Atlantic was featuring the Vagina Monologues and of course had it advertised on the marquee. And according to my many inside sources, some chick got all freaked out and shit cause her little niece saw the word vagina on the fuckin marquee.

The soccer mom pitched a fit to the theater and they pussied up and changed the shit to the Hoo-ha Monologues. What are these muthafuckers, thirteen? And it’s not like this is some cheap production put on by Willie the wino and his whores from down the way. This is some legit, award winning, known around the world shit.

But after a day or so the theater owners realized that they were actually barred by contract from changing the stupid name and were forced to change it back. Now this baffles me to no fuckin end.

I can understand if the muthafucker was called the “Pussy Farts Monologues”, or “the Ole slappy cunt monologues” or even “women who joke and talk about issues relating to their pussies monologues”.

Cause shit like that might offend or perk the little snapper heads interest and may even cause em to ask their punk ass parents an actual hard question or two which might cause the parents to think on their own.

But to get upset over the proper medical term vagina is just fucked up. It’s like come the fuck on, what’s gonna happen when the little girl starts her period or wants to know why there’s a hole down there.

What’s the parent gonna do, lie to her and tell her it’s her fuckin monkey or magic box or that’s where the dollar bills come from? I’m just saying and shit.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Ole Blue The Heretic said...

You know that anything anyone will say is something someone somewhere does not want to hear.

Yet these fuckers who own businesses are so afraid of losing a dollar that they will listen to what ever stupid fucker hates something despite the fact that the stupid fucker is one in a million.

What people should start saying is “Shut the fuck up you fucking whiner” and keep going. It is time those offended fuckers stop living in their little make believe world and grow the fuck up.

11:28 AM  
Blogger Rusty said...

That story and Ole Blue's comment remind me of a story that goes along with this......

When I worked at the record store, I'd play a rock compilation in the PA that whenever I played it, we'd sell a few copies of the CD. This wouldn't happen with anything else we played.

One night, a woman checking out our Christian music section complained about the music, called the corporate office, and I was told we could no longer play the CD in the store.

Because of one annoying bitch who never came in the store again, we had to lose some profit. To kiss one ass, we lost money.

12:12 PM  

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