small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: hammer time

Thursday, April 26

hammer time

Just thought I’d share a few things bouncing around in my head this morning.

Me and some of my many unknown sources were talking about the FCC who are urging the all the bobble heads in Washington to restrict the amount of violence on the fuckin TV.

They want regulations that would restrict all violent programming to late evening. And I quote;

“Clearly, steps should be taken to protect children from excessively violent programming. Some might say such action is long overdue. Parents need more tools to protect children from excessively violent programming.”

Hmmmm, I don’t know about you but to me this reeks of bullshit.

Parents don’t need more tools, they just need to step up and act like parents. I hear parents or kids all the time say shit like “my father is my best friend. My child is my best friend”.

Well when I was coming up and my old man said step off from the fuckin TV; believe me I knew that this wasn’t my “best friend” asking me.

It was my father telling me to turn that muthafucker off and if I took a second longer then he thought was fit, my ass would get handed to me on the end of his fuckin Broughams.

Fuck, every muthafucker that has cable has the ability to lock out certain channels. The majority of newer TV’s come with the programmable V-Chip to also lock out shit that you don’t want your kids to see. Even the fuckin DVD’s now have the “pussy” option that cuts out some of bad language and violence.

More help my ass?

What parents need is to stop being pussies and learn to tell their inbred little bastards no. And if no isn’t good enough, back it up with the back of their hand.

And if that isn’t good enough take the fuckin TV away. Because if I’m paying out the ass for cable TV, I don’t want Washington telling me what I can or when I can watch shit.

Don’t deny me my shit because parents can’t control their little bed-wetter’s. And don’t fuck with my shit simply because grown ass muthafuckers can’t put his house in order.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Anonymous Anonymous said...

sometimes it was just "the look" or how hard he was walking down the hallway and we were reaching for the off switch.
--so remembers the sister

9:07 AM  
Blogger Janet said...

I have not suceeded as a parent until my children tell me how much they hate me for "ruining" their life.

9:30 AM  
Anonymous Karen said...

Funny to read this today, as I am working on a long essay entitled "You're Not That Special", about the trophy generation - kids who seem to think they deserve a trophy for every single freaking thing they do correctly, up to and including using the potty. Not my kid, honey, believe me.

12:25 PM  
Blogger Xavier Onassis said...

I agree. Parents already have the only tool they need to control how much violence their child sees on TV. It's called the fucking Power Button. Just turn that shit off.

Janet, my daughter, young Galadriel Tanqueray Onassis, used to throw herself on the ground, scream, and yell, "I HATE YOU!!!" I would just laugh and say "Yeah, I don't care."

She's 13 now and she doesn't pitch fits anymore because she learned that it doesn't work.

Ain't parenting grand?

5:50 PM  
Blogger Joe said...

My parents have never been my "friend" They're my goddamn parents. When I was a kid I did what I was told because I respected my parents, and I knew I'd get my ass hit if I didn't. That teaches respect in a hurry. My dad had great voice control over us so he didn't have to hit us. But, we knew he would and that's all it took.
With my son, it was the same way. I hardly ever spanked him, and by the time he was 4 the spankings were all over. I made him stand in the corner instead. His mom hit him a lot and later in life my son told me the corner was worse than the beating.
I don't need anyone telling me what to watch on TV, certainly not the government busybodies.

9:34 PM  
Blogger Joe said...

I also linked to this post on my own blog. It must be "Get Riled Up Day" today.

11:43 PM  
Blogger SmedRock said...

As usual Greg you are dead on. My spawn, understand too well. If I need to get up so you can understand me, the negotiations are over. It is always easier to hear me the first time. The voice control thing I understand, I had to LEARN that talent. But thanks to a couple different career paths I had taken, I had found my voice. Hell, my nephews in the next county east of me understand when the Uncle speaks, you best listen. I am not an advocate of beating a child senseless, but I tell you what, I still will not to this day curse in front of my mother. I have vivid memories of the hot wheel track and the 3 foot of reach she gained with it. XO had it right, the only tool that is required is the power button.

7:26 AM  
Anonymous The brother said...


4:42 PM  

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