small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: sweatin the small stuff

Friday, June 29

sweatin the small stuff

From the “when you know the time is right” department…………..

Comes word that a study involving more then sixty years of intense research has ended.

Yes, after decades of research and study, countless hours of intense scrutiny, scientists have concluded that when it comes to penises, length matters more to men than to women.

Yeah, it seems that when it comes to that complex creature that we call woman, it really boils down to it not being the size of the ship but the motion of the ocean.

Actually the study says that about ninety percent of women actually prefer a wide penis to a long one. While eighty-five percent of women reported being satisfied with their partner’s penis size, compared to only fifty-fifty percent for men.

Now I can understand where this study comes from because for years next to my bed I used to have a plaque inscribed with the words “the myth stops here”.

And let me go on to say that it took me many, many years to actually get comfortable with my dick and even today in my late forties, me and my dick still have to hug it out.

Well actually we hug it out quite a bit. Ok, maybe more then quite a bit if there is such a thing but that’s fodder for another post.

To tell you the truth the study only confirms what I’ve always known. That “real women” love the cock.

Meaning that for most parts a cock is a cock is a cock, and the man behind the cock is what really matters.

And that makes me feel better knowing that next time I drop trou and expose to all the magic show that is big willie and the twins, she’s actually laughing with me and not at me?

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Xavier Onassis said...

My daddy always said, "it ain't the length of the rope or the depth of the well. It's how you dangle the bucket."

Actually, my daddy never told me that. If he had, I might have gotten laid more.

I think I heard a wino downtown yelling that at the Federal Courthouse.

9:51 PM  
Blogger satyavati said...

You know, not that I'm a whore or whatever, but I've seen more naked man-parts than any human ought to have to see.

With the exception of a few rather stunning infections and injuries, they're all basically the same. They come so small you practically have to turn someone inside out to find it, so big it gets in the way, in all colours and in varying degrees of hygiene (EW), but in the end it's just another body part. And not to bust anyone's ego, but they don't look all that different at 85 from 18. Not ALL that different. The rest of the body might be an aging mess, but for whatever reason, the weenie just don't show it like everything else does.

As Frank Perdue used to say, "parts is parts". The only thing that makes it attractive at all is the guy who's got it, and if he's an idiot, well, then he's all out of luck.

You might be driving a 1959 Impala, but if you're an idiot, then it's just another rolling chunk of metal in my way.

Did that at all make sense?

5:49 PM  
Blogger Spyder said...

satyavati - "they don't look all that different at 85 from 18" Maybe because weenies start with wrinles from the start so we are use to them.

9:10 PM  
Blogger Joe said...

You all will probably chuckle at this but I found acceptance of my, uh, size, from Howard Stern of all people. I figured if he could be open about his smaller penis, well, my one standard deviation smaller penis wasn't that big of an issue. Only my first wife complained about my lack of ground dragging size. I did tell her I didn't think I was filling up the Grand Canyon. Maybe that's why she's an ex.
And, that's more information than most of you wanted to hear in the first place.

9:38 PM  

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