small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: sweatin the small stuff

Friday, July 6

sweatin the small stuff

I think that in honor of the new Transformers movie I should just go ahead and build myself a giant flying robot.

Why? Because owning your own giant robot would be the coolest thing to come down the pike in years. I’d be like Johnny Sokko and his Flying Robot, where the giant robot would do my bidding without question.

Because even though I can’t speak for anyone else, I for one wouldn’t mind owning my own slave and what better slave then a giant robot that flies and shit?

Talk about being a despotic muthafucker.

What, you like parking on my side of the white line? I’ll have giant flying robot smash your shit the fuck up. What, you’re rolling a brand new Lexus? Bitch I got a giant flying robot. Fuck your new Lexus. As a matter of fact the next sound you hear is you crying like a slapped three-year old because my giant flying robot just took your Lexus and slung it into orbit.

Yeah I’d have a real cool chair installed on the shoulder of my giant flying robot so I could ride it around and order it to do shit via way of my telepathic helmet.

Oh yes, I’d have to rock the telepathic helmet because for one I think shit would be too loud for voice commands plus who looks cool all hollering waving around like a retard? I’ll just sit on top of my giant robot and glare at muthafuckers all omnipotent and shit. That’s the ticket plus chicks dig giant flying robots.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger PGP said...

Chicks Dig Giant Flying Robots?

Cheers man!
It's Friday and time for a beer.

1:01 PM  
Blogger Nightmare said...

HOLY DIVER!! Someone else who remembers Johnny Sakko and Giant Robot! I'm telling you we were brothers in a past life!

1:38 PM  
Blogger Xavier Onassis said...

Shit. I thought you were a giant flying robot!

I'm so disappointed.

6:42 PM  
Blogger Spyder said...

What about a giant chick robot? ya that's it.

9:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought we were supposed to get those when it turned into the year 2000. That's what I always wrote in those essays in school, about flying cars and robots. I need one like in the Jetsons.

9:22 AM  

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