small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: moonwalking whales

Monday, August 27

moonwalking whales


After a busy week of hugging trees, what better way for you and your friends to unwind then to hop aboard a boat to observe the mighty whale in their natural habitat.

You’re smelling the salty sea air and the mist from the waves are creating rainbows as you and all the other passengers start exclaiming and pointing as a whale rises to the surface spraying water from its blowhole.

You’re as giddy and excited as a little schoolgirl as you and all the other passengers watch the huge whales frolic hither and yon in the great ocean expanse. Leaning against the ship’s railing is a little girl who is heard to exclaim, “look mommy, the whale’s moon walking”.

You look up in time to see one of the whales swimming backwards thru the water. “The fuck?”

By now the railing is crowded with people who are screaming and shouting at this larger ship that has appeared just a few hundred yards away.

The reason the whale seems to be swimming backwards is because the larger vessel is a Japanese whaler that has just harpooned it and is dragging that muthafucker in. All this happened Friday morning off the coast of Hokkaido's Shiretoko Peninsula in Japan.

From what my many inside sources tell me, there were at least three whale-watching boats full of “eco-tourists” who were out for a morning of whale watching. That is until a whaler showed up and started harpooning whales like they were going out of style.

From what I can gather, muthafuckers were crying and screaming and just losing their minds as the whaler did its thing hauling in the whale.

The forty-six-year-old captain of one of the passenger vessels was disappointed by the incident. "It's my job to show people whales and it's the whalers' job to catch them, but I wonder how this can be avoided.”

Well sunshine, it can be avoided by somebody learning how to schedule their shit so that whale-watchers and whale hunters aren’t in the same area together.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"

1 Comments:

Blogger PGP said...

Ever heard of Elizabeth May???
I'm borrowing this for her... :)

2:41 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home