small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>power tool abuse???</strong>

Friday, October 24

power tool abuse???

I was outside having a couple of smokes for lunch and I got mentally involved in these cats doing some jackhammer work around the building. I might be wrong but it seemed very relaxing, yes, no? But oddly it kept bringing to mind this San Francisco lesbian porno I watched one day. I guess the reason why was that I’m sure as a muthafucker if you got the right chick with a jackhammer it’d make for some fine entertainment. In this porno I saw there were chicks using air chisels with dildos stuck on the ends of em, and they seemed to be having the time of their lives. You had half a dozen oiled up nekked women in the middle of the room and off in the corner was this bigassed air compressor hooked up to all these pneumatic tools. Air chisels, impact wrenches, all kinds of shit. There’d be some chick strapped to a huge cross frame and after covering her in lube oil the other chicks would plug in one of the tools and have a go at the chick’s cooze for a while. And during all the time the chick’s getting ramjammed up the cooze by an impact wrench set on warp speed she’s screaming, “YEAH! YEAH! HIT THAT MUTHAFUCKER! YEAH!! OH MY GOD, BEAT THAT PUSSY!!! BEAT THAT PUSSY! THAT’S MOMMY’S PUSSY! YEAH! YEAH”! And I’m here to tell you, seein a woman enjoy herself so much was kind’a touching. The look on the faces of the other chick’s in the movie were almost frightening though, after the strapped up chick was done they turned on each other. It was like some fucked up carnage and shit. They’re all crouched down staring at each other to see who’d blink first and suddenly one of em would bum rush one of the other’s and forearm her ass down and next thing you knew, that chick had a Dirt Devil or some such shit getting shoved up her ass. It was like goddamn, I’m glad I’m not a lesbian living in San Francisco getting all frisky with the Snap-On tools and shit. But then again, a cat can’t buy that kind of fun.

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