small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words.</strong>

Wednesday, January 14

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words.

After work yesterday I went by the Hurricane to have some coffee and hang out with Mito for a while. Whilst there she told me how she got a ticket for not having her tags properly displayed on her car, so being the helpful person that I am, and it being her, I offered to put her tags on for her. Later I'm sitting there listening to CorEy and Mr. Wilson plot out their evening since both were wifeless for the night, and much to my pleasant surprise Michelle walks in. I hadn’t planned on seeing her since I thought she had plans for the evening. But she told me she was free and clear and hungry, so we decided on a game plan for dinner and after giving Mito a hug we split. Once at my house I changed into some eveningwear, and the both of us settled onto the couch for dinner and TV viewing.

So between eating pizza and trying to figure which of us was the bigger freak, we started watching MTV’s The Real World. And by the way I told Michelle she was the bigger freak. But then after listening to her as she counted off on both hands the things that made me the bigger freak, I had to concede defeat. Who knew? But anyway we were watchin “The Real World” mainly because one of the cast members happened to be a hometown girl, and one of the other girls had this huge rack we wanted to see. I’m not into the Real World but Michelle’s all about that kind of shit. But it was interesting because the chick with the huge rack called the fey black cast member a Nigger, and he freaked out and ran to call his momma and shit. Then all the other cast members decided to confront the chick with the huge rack and front her out over using that word. But then whilst crying her drunken ass off, the chick with the huge rack screamed out something to do with being raped by a black man so it was ok for her to use that word.

Michelle was all engrossed in the dramatic goings on, but all I could think of was the chick’s huge rack and were they real or not. Not that that would make a difference cause I’d do her in a hot second, and real or fake rack wouldn’t make me think twice. Hmmmm, that wasn’t very sensitive of me was it? Fuck it, its MTV, so who gives a shit. But what was odd the chick from Kansas City was scared shitless of big boats. They showed the group on a pier in LA, and an ocean liner was going past and the chick freaked all out and shit. Crying and shaking like a little spastic bitch. So Michelle and I ran to the computer to find out what her odd little phobia was called. We never did find anything under fear of bigass boats, but we did see some fucked up ones, which I’ve listed some of below. And remember, to give the phobia a name, somebody had to go thru it. Like some of the dumbass warnings on the back of shit you buy, warning, do not shove your cock into the vacuum cleaner hose, you stupid fuck”!

Alektorophobia- Fear of chickens.
Aulophobia- Fear of flutes.
Coulrophobia- Fear of clowns.
Dutchphobia- Fear of the Dutch.
Eurotophobia- Fear of female genitalia.
Ephebiphobia- Fear of teenagers.
Francophobia- Fear of France or French culture
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words.
Ithyphallophobia- Fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis.
Lutraphobia- Fear of otters
Medomalacuphobia- Fear of losing an erection.
Medorthophobia- Fear of an erect penis.
Novercaphobia- Fear of your step-mother
Pteronophobia- Fear of being tickled by feathers.
Pupaphobia - Fear of puppets.
Walloonphobia- Fear of the Walloons.
Zemmiphobia- Fear of the great mole rat.


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