small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: I can't be the only one?

Thursday, December 21

I can't be the only one?

When I’m at home sitting on the couch in my underwear doing the serious channel surfing, one of my favorite pastimes is getting stuck on the Spanish language channel Univision.

I admire the Spanish speaking peoples for their dedication to tradition and their rich histories and the many worldly accomplishments and inventions they’ve given us but more importantly, I love the fuck out’a watching their women. Call em what you will, Hispanic, Latino, Spanish, Cuban, Puerto-Ricans, or whatever, I love em all.

It’s a wonderful thing when you can turn on fuckin Univision early on a Saturday morning and come upon a kids show and sprinkled amongst the little bastards are hot women jumping around shaking their junk. You got Don Francisco's Sábado Gigante, El Gordo y La Flaca, and La Parodia just to name a few shows.

I don’t even understand Spanish but I can watch these shows all day because of the women on em. And then just to make me jump off the cliff there is Caliente, which is a dance show. Think of Soul-Train but set on a hot sunny beach or pool featuring shitloads of smoking hot Latin women wearing nothing but tiny tiny bikinis and jumping around like crazed ferrets.

Now please don’t misunderstand me because I love all women, wither they be black, white, red, yellow, it don’t matter to me none at all. But a whole network where the national rule seems to dictate that every woman on the fuckin network must look hot and wear skimpy clothes and move to impress? Shit, like my pal Jeff Key would say, pass me the beer nuts.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Anonymous Serra said...

When I had Direct TV I got addicted to watching Lucha Libre on Galavision because so many of my favorite wrestlers work in Mexico these days.

I only understood about every tenth sentence but I didn't need the commentary to watch the fun.

4:25 PM  
Blogger Happy In Bag said...

I have no idea what you're talking about...

6:31 PM  
Anonymous Mike said...

Oh yeah, I watch them too.

The other day, I think it might have been Sat. or Sun. morning also, I was doing the channel flip and what do I see?

A whole episode of a Spanish-language soap opera where every other woman was wearing full horseback-riding regalia. Fancy blouses and hats, yes, but what got me drooling were the tight riding pants and knee-high boots on these finely-built specimens of Latina beauty.

Yep, the remote got lost there for a while.

7:24 PM  
Blogger Ole Blue The Heretic said...

The women on the Spanish language channels are fucking beautiful, hot, sexy and any other adverb or adjective you can describe a woman of great charm and beuty. OPlus they are fucking hot!

I also love the energy in the shows. Lots of passion. Plus the women are fucking hot.

Did I say the women are fucking hot?

I am going watch TV

8:40 PM  
Blogger HateTaxes said...

I used to put on the spanish channel and put some GNR or AC/DC on the stereo. Good tunes and sexy women, nice combo. Try what ever music you like.

8:58 PM  
Blogger Matty said...

I loves me some Univision. Something odd I have noticed is the soap operas, with or without Erik "Pimpjuice" Estrada. The women are of the compulsory hotness level, and they are ALL rockin' the cleavage, but the strange thing is that it also seems to be a prerequisite that one of their tits be two cup sizes out of synch with its buddy. Don't get me wrong, I know that having a symmetrical pair is rare nigh unto impossible, but these tits are noticeably and in some cases awesomely mismatched. Just an observation. Make of it what you will. Hooters. Gotta love 'em in any language.

5:22 PM  

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