giant robots for lunch

I’m sitting at work and around lunchtime I came to the very important conclusion that I really didn’t want to be there or here.

So I left and went to see a movie which happened to be the new “Transformers” movie.

Being that I was never a fan of the cartoon series I had no great expectations nor am one of those elitist muthafuckers who can’t stand Michael Bay movies. I mean really, if you go see one of his movies for deep thoughts and the meaning of life and shit, you got some muthafuckin issues to begin with.

Plus c’mon, it’s a movie about giant talking robots from outer space that kick the shit out of each other and blow more shit up, so fuckin Hamlet it’s not.

So let me tell you that I enjoyed the muthafuckin fuck out of it.

First off it’s a movie I think you can take the kids too because even though there’s a few instances of adult type language, the giant robots and blowing up shit are so badass that the kids won’t even notice.

The Autobots are big, soulful and just cooler then shit.

And to hear Optimus Prime speak in the original cartoon voice just rocks with its cock out. I only wish that he would’a pulled a Samuel Jackson and said something like “I AM MUTHAFUCKIN OPTIMUS PRIME!”

Because I’m so sure the next sound in the theater would have been the collective sound of every fan-boy achieving orgasm at the same time.

So take some advice type shit from me. Leave your fuckin brain out in the car, buy you some popcorn and sit down with a coke and a smile.

Because unless you’re just some type of sissified punk bitch you will leave the theater telling yourself over and over “I am OPTIMUS PRIME”!

"and the monkey flipped the switch"