Back in the day I had what I thought was the perfect gig. I was the general manager for a big rock & roll music store here in mid-town. I originally started as the janitor but worked my way into management. I dug what I did and enjoyed giving my friends the long stroke every now and then. I figured hell, what’s the use of managing the world’s hippest music store if I couldn’t help a cat out with the gig. But aside from having the Midis Touch I was still the freak. I did the music store during the day and bounced during the night. So oddly enough I wasn’t the most pleasant cat to be around some time. The music store was staffed by a crew of seasoned musicians that had been there and done that and did their time on the road, so they knew the deal. I sometimes gave em too much shit cause as with all good salespeople their bottom line wasn’t my bottom line but they produced. After one particularly rude week of me being a ranting idiot I was looking out my office window onto a busy crowded sales floor. My office was on the second floor of the building and I had a great view of the whole store. Everybody was busy makin deals and gear was moving out the door. I had to leave to deliver a rental and was gone for most of the morning. When I returned that afternoon the place was unusually crowded and I saw a bunch of regular faces from many of the working bands around town. Everything seemed ship shape so I made my way up to my office to do some work. Next to my office sat Vickie the bookkeeper, and she smiled and nodded as I passed her desk on the way into my office, nothing out of place there. My office was set up where I could hit one switch and along with the lights; my computer and stereo would also come on. Well, I walked into my dark office and hit the light switch and the whole fuckin world blew up in my face. The explosion knocked me to my knees and for a few seconds I was deaf and blind as a newborn baby. Thick black smoke billowed out of my office as I staggered to my feet and fell out the office door. “What the fuck happened, I screamed to Vickie”? I got back to my feet and looked into my office and I could see black smoke coming up from underneath my desk. I looked out the window and the entire floor was full of people staring up at me. As soon as they spotted me in the window the whole floor just lost it, people were screaming and cheering and shit. Did I mention that to the staff of the music store the national pastime was the good practical joke? My ass had been had. I found out later that as soon as I was out of sight everybody went into commando mode and shit. You ever see the bright flares that go off at rock concerts? That’s what’s called a smoke pot. That’s what they set up under my desk to go off when I hit the light switch. I was told that people were crawling on their bellies in the dark to set this shit up. Other music stores were even in on the gag. The staff had planned this for weeks to teach me a lesson for being such a harsh asshole. I loved that job. Peace