small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: <strong>sweatin the small stuff</strong>

Friday, February 11

sweatin the small stuff
If it came right down to it, I’d take a bullet for Michelle without any hesitation. I love her that much. But after being made to watch Napoleon Dynamite with her the other night I’m afraid I’d have to let her bleed out all over my carpet. I didn’t really care for it one bit. It was one of those movies where I sit there and smile politely just because the other person is so into it.

I understood and recognized all the characters but whatever humor there was in the movie escaped me. Well, maybe escaped me is the wrong term, it had to be there to escape me didn’t it? Michelle on the other hand loved the muthafucker and this is the same woman that gives me grief for liking Phenomenon starring John Travolta which is a great movie. Moving on.

the pink shirt really was gay
And in more news on the pussiefication of America, some kid is suing his high school and another student for over fifty thousand dollars. According to my many inside sources the pussie kid in question who’s in high school decided to wear a pink collared short sleeved shirt to school one day. As he’s walking down the hall this other kid passed him and after taking note of his pink shirt called him a punkassed fag and dissed on his pink shirt. After hearing this the kid in the pink shirt called the other kid out and they met after school where pink shirt got his ass handed to em. Now with all that being said here’s my personal view on shit.

What is the world coming too when you lose a fight and your plan of action is to sue? Even though he was called some names and shit, which I admit wasn’t cool; the pink shirt wearing pussie did challenge the other kid to a fight after school, which I think would negate the lawsuit. Back in the day if I got caught wearin a pink shirt to school, I fully understood that trouble might ensue and I might have to fight my way home and maybe get my assed kicked over my fashion tastes. I mean like goddamn, you’re a male and wearin a pink short sleeved shirt to high school? You better have the cool to pull it off or the balls to say, “fuck you” to all the naysayers and be able to back your shit up. I’m just sayin and all.

dumber then a bag full of pee
And in news of the dumb stupid and ignorant, up around New York the police finally nabbed the infamous “stupid bandit”. Cops were able to connect up to thirteen bank robberies to this dumb bastard due to his habit of misspelling the same words on his holdup notes. According to my many inside sources he habitually spelled robbery as “robri” and quick as “kwick” and car as “ker” amongst other shit. What a joke, I heard he couldn’t even spell “homoerotically” correct; he kept putting e’s in the muthafucker where they didn’t belong.

Hanging blue jesus, what a dumbass, don’t you hate when that happens? The local cops caught up with him due to the efforts of a sharp-eyed customer who noticed this strange cat standing in front a teller. The cat stood out due to his slack jaws and loud mouth breathing, which is the universal sign of a dumbass.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Nightmare said...

Not only did I have the Balls, but I also had plenty of "whoop ass" in a can for anyone who made fun of my pink shirt!

It was the 80's you know..I also had the squared off knit tie (grey) to go with the mutherfucker!

And yes, I was styling with my Members only jacket, and grey boots.

11:48 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home