happy 4th

Woke up this morning with memories of the strangest dream. There I was walking down this hallway, where on one side stood these huge windows that looked out on a ridge of mountains, on the other side stood an Applebee’s restaurant? Walking toward me is an old friend who as she leaned up to kiss me, suddenly grabbed hold of my throat with her teeth thus dragging me to the floor. We’re on the floor struggling and rolling about as I try to break the hold she has on my throat with her teeth.

As I unclench her jaws she switches gears and starts kissing me hard on the mouth whilst at the same time grinding her breasts into my chest. As I run my hands across her writhing body, I’m thinking this is good and soon the painful teeth on my throat are just a dim memory. She reaches her hand out to my ample waist and as she begins to shove it into my pants I black out only to wake up sitting at this small table inside the Applebee’s. I’m looking around and I notice the odd seating inside the restaurant.

There must be thousands of people seated, and instead of being laid out on a flat plan the seating is tiered like a movie theater. Everyone is eating and staring at the large stage where Luther Vandross is singing? Isn’t he dead I ask myself as I notice something else really odd. I’m sitting in a giant Applebee’s totally buck assed nekked. I’m not wearing a stitch of clothing and as a waitress passes, I ask her what the fuck’s going on?

She tells me that I have to talk to a manager and where was he I asked only to see her point to the top tier in the restaurant. I start climbing to where he’s sitting talking to customers which I find very embarrassing cause after all I am buck assed nekked and shit. But I get to the manager and after asking him about my clothes he directs me to this red door just a few yards away. I enter the door only to find myself in a long dirty tunnel leading down to who the fuck knows where. At that time I figured shit was getting too freaky and made my self wake up. I took a large pee and commenced to looking at the Hun’s Yellow Pages on the internet to calm myself down.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"