For some odd reason I’ve been noticing a slew of really fucked up TV commercials as of late.
One starts off with a group of bikers blowing down the freeway who eventually end up at some picnic or rally. These cats hop off the bikes all grizzled and manly with their leathers on and all that good shit.
Then a picture of this thing pops up that looks like a giant panty shield. And the commercial’s implying that all the bikers were sporting one of these under their Levis and chaps and shit.
I think the tagline was “for when you just can’t stop”. Or at least I think that’s what it was about because my mind was still stuck in what the fuck mode.
Then there’s the commercial put out by this insurance company. It shows a bunch of cute white bunnies going thru physical therapy.
Because they’re all sporting a prosthetic foot that looks speciously like a rabbit’s foot lucky charm.
The commercial wants you to believe that all these poor rabbits that had their feet removed to make good luck charms have had em reattached. The tagline goes something like “you don’t need good luck anymore”.
But my favorite out of the current crop starts off with two women sitting in a living room visiting.
They’re talking and shit while in the background you hear this little boy hollering “mommy” over and over again.
The two chicks keep ignoring the kid who finally comes into view exclaiming how the dog has learned a new trick. And into view comes this large dog dragging his ass across the carpet.
You know that thing dogs do when their asshole gets to irritating em? And they sit down on their asses with their back feet all splayed out whilst dragging themselves with their front feet?
That’s what the fuckin dog’s doing and when the mom sees this she freaks the fuck out screaming about how she just had the carpet cleaned. It’s an ad for a carpet cleaning service which has to be the most realistic commercial I’ve ever seen.
"and the monkey flipped the switch"