small brush shouldn't fuck with big timber

Death's Door, the view from the Spanish announcers table: things You Should Know that I learned from watching porn

Sunday, October 16

things You Should Know that I learned from watching porn

1. Money isn't made out of paper, it's made out of cotton.

2. The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper.

3. The dot over the letter i is called a "tittle"

4. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.

5. Susan Lucci is the daughter of Phyllis Diller.

6. 40% of McDonald's profits come from the sales of Happy Meals.

7. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 Dictionary were misspelled.

8. The 'spot' on 7UP comes from its inventor, who had red eyes. He was albino.

9. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents, daily.

10. Warren Beatty and Shirley MacLaine are brother and sister.

11. Chocolate affects a dog's heart and nervous system; a few ounces will kill a small sized dog.

12. Orcas (killer whales) kill sharks by torpedoing up into the shark's stomach from underneath, causing the shark to explode.

13. Most lipstick contains fish scales (eeww).

14. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.

15. Ketchup was sold in the 1830s as medicine.

16. Upper and lower case letters are named 'upper' and 'lower' because in the time when all original print had to be set in individual letters, the 'upper case' letters were stored in the case on top of the case that stored the smaller, 'lower case' letters.

17. Leonardo da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time ... hence, multi-tasking was invented.

"and the monkey flipped the switch"


Blogger Rusty said...

You sure you weren't watching the History Channel instead and got confused?? ;)

6:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Should'nt that be the other way around
or for some cosmic reason both of your brains switched bodys for a few minutes.

18. Women don't moan that loud its's just for our amusement.

19. Do not ask your woman to moan as loud as the woman on tv.

20. things appear lager on tv than the do in real life.

21. Jim carry got his idea of makeing funny faces from porn movies.

22. This is for the men. If you touch a woman in the right spot she will bark like a dog and spray like a foutain.

23. Porn stars are in more shape than we are so don't try any of this at home.

24. You won't go blind.

25. Greg watches to much porn.

2:18 PM  
Anonymous Brian said...

Might want to read this:

Seems the Lucci/Diller connection ain't necessarily so.

11:46 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home