Fred Phelps is a rat bastard muthafucker

You know that Fred Phelps and his ilk are such inbred hateful ass-hats that I can imagine the grand wizard of the local KKK calling Fred and telling him to turn the hate down a notch or two.

“Goddamn Fred. We’re all about hating a muthafucker but shit you’re making us all look bad”.

I just saw an interview on Fox featuring one of his ball juggling relatives and I can say for sure that this is one simple minded bitch that would make that open sewer of a slut Paris Hilton look like a fuckin Rhodes Scholar. And even after hearing her talk I found hard to understand or believe how a person could hate so much.

I wasn’t around during most of those times but watching her must have been akin to Blacks watching some cat from the ole south not only hang their kin but run for national office and feel sad and angry that shit’s so fucked up. Or Jews in Europe listening to Adolph for the very first time and understanding that their lives would never be the same or that maybe their god had forgotten them.

What would bring a person and his ilk to hate so fuckin much that they would stoop to the lows that they do? Did Fred experiment during his younger years and hate the ass fuckin that much that he would go on a lifelong vendetta against gays and everyone that didn’t adhere to his brand of self servicing righteous bullshit? Would a little lube or a simple reach-around or a goddamned hug and a cuddle afterwards have made Fred a nicer muthafucker?

Fuck, if Fred so truly believed in his own “god” why doesn’t he ever go to the hood or the barrio and protest shit or take his stupid ass over to Iraq and pitch his tent? Why because he knows that those muthafuckers wouldn’t put up with his shit and put a bullet in his fuckin brain pan and those who belong to his little band of cocksuckers.

I’m just saying that here’s a cat so fucked up and who’s skating the edge of the law so close that Congress, fuckin Congress, came together in a rare show of unison and passed an emergency law into effect trying to keep this glory hole robber in check. These muthafuckers can’t even manage the fuckin Iraq war but came to the table to deal with this rat bastard.

And to tell you the truth, I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Amish folk over the years and even though I’m not a religious man, I can’t think of a people as a whole that I’ve met who’s closer to their God then they are and Phelps wants to fuck with them?

It’s like a good friend of mine said and forgive me for misquoting but I’ve had a few Beams & cokes. I hope if Fred and his fellow knuckle dragging, spavined legged, inbred, incestuous, cousin fuckin, hating all, band of cocksuckers decide to go protest at the services of those dead Amish children.

That some switch flips in the head of the Amish mothers and fathers of those murdered children and they show ole Fred and his family what fire and brimstone and God’s wrath is all about. Because I really believe that if there is a true god, no matter what name he goes by, he doesn’t recognize Fred Phelps and his church and brings some righteous thunder and all that good shit against him.

It’s like I told some people tonight. It would fuckin rock to be around for the second coming and hear Jesus speak to the people. And watch as Fred Phelps who’s of course sitting up front go paler then a muthafucker throwing up his lunch as from the crowd some cat is heard to exclaim; “is that Jesus talking with a fuckin lisp?” I’m just saying and shit.


"and the monkey flipped the switch"